If You're Still Alive, My Regrets are Few
by heartbends
Summary: AU Something she had decided though, was to get over Lucas Scott, or at least make a good run at trying to. Starts after 518's "I Hate You"
1. Chapter 1

"_I hate you." _

"_I wish you had never come back. You ruined my life." _

…

Lucas felt his temples pulsing when he awoke in the late morning. His vision was still blurry from the alcohol he had consumed the night before, and he could already hear Nathan and Jamie rattling off outside his door. He pulled the pillow over his head and groaned loudly before they could come inside. At this point, he was in hopes that they were just passing through, not planning for a long term visit.

"Dude, are you _still_ asleep?" he heard Nathan say before slamming the door behind him. He just _had_ to slam the door. He could feel the pulse in his temples move towards his neck; he hated being hung over, but being with Nathan _and_ hung over sounded like the worst thing that could have ever happened to him.

He grumbled, burying his head further into the pillow, while he felt Jamie tugging on his arm. "Uncle Lucas, you really need to get up, it's almost lunch time." He informed him, still tugging his arm. "I want a grilled cheese."

Nathan's throaty laughter filled the room, making his head pound even harder. He muttered into the pillow before turning his back to his nephew and brother. "Hey Jamie, why don't you jump on the bed with Uncle Luke, he'll love that." Nathan taunted, still laughing.

If this wasn't hell, it was pretty fucking close, he was sure.

…

Peyton had been listening to the same track over and over for the last twenty minutes, and she still couldn't find anything that she liked about it. She pressed pause and let out a frustrated sigh before looking up at Haley. "Maybe she doesn't have it, Haley."

Haley looked up from her notebook laid across her knees and tilted her head. "Maybe you aren't paying attention." She said before tossing her pen back onto Peyton's desk. "I think it sounds fine."

Peyton ran her hands through her hair and let out yet another frustrated groan. "_Fine_ isn't going to sell records, Haley." She stood up, crossing the room to flip through her list of demos. Frustrated, she finally threw the book in the floor, "I can't do this today."

"You know Peyton, it is okay to take a day off and relax every once in a while."

She turned her head in Haley's direction before sitting down in the window seal, letting out yet another frustrated sigh. "I'm sorry Haley I just…there's a lot going on between…well going on with me." She corrected herself before she could even say 'me and Lucas'. The fact of the matter was, there was no she and Lucas. "I'm really sorry."

It broke Haley's heart a little to see Peyton like this. Even if Lucas was her best friend it didn't mean that she wanted to see Peyton cry over him every day of her life. "You know, Peyton maybe you should…go on a date or something." She suggested, knowing that the idea would be shot down almost immediately. "I mean, I know it's not what you want to do but it could help you…move on."

The thought of going on a date with someone felt unnatural to her. In almost every relationship she had been on, she'd hardly dated. Sure, she had been out to the occasional concert or movie, and she had of course eaten with her boyfriends in public, but it wasn't something she was very good or natural at.

Something she had decided though, was to get over Lucas Scott, or at least make a good run at trying to.

…

The light was still harsh as Lucas sipped on his black coffee, an hour or so later. He had decided that it was either lay in bed and mope around all day, or get up and mope around all day. He hadn't decided for himself, really, Nathan had told him to get off of his ass and do something besides drink and cry. He hadn't been quite as amused as Jamie was. "My head." He muttered looking up at Nathan, who gave him a look before bursting into a fit of laughter. "Ugh, what? What?"

"You totally deserve it first of all." He pointed out, glancing out at the playground to make sure that Jamie was still in his vision. "You break two girls' hearts and you get to mope around all the fucking time? You're such a dick."

"First of all, no one asked Peyton to come back to town, second of all, Lindsey has had every opportunity to come back home and she hasn't."

"And yet you're still moping around like the asshole that you are. Typical. Haley would kick my ass." Nathan was right, Haley would kick his ass, but he was also right about something else: he was a dick.

Sure, he hadn't exactly been the nicest guy to Peyton lately, telling her that he hated her probably topped the list of the most assholeish things he had done in his life. It wasn't like he actually meant it, he had said it to make her feel like he did.

Nathan was definitely right. He was a dick.

…

The laughter Peyton heard when she walked through the door of her—Well, Brooke's house, made her heart break a little. The sight of what she saw inside was much worse – Brooke and Lucas sitting on the couch with a purple monkey between them playing with Angie.

Their heads both snapped towards her direction, eyeing her questionably like she didn't belong there. All she wanted to do was scream at them that she lived here, that she had just as much right to be there as _he_ did.

"Having fun?" the words felt thick in her throat before they even left her mouth, she could hear how cold the words sounded, but she couldn't stop them. "Looks like it, at least."

Brooke looked at her like she was crazy or something. She definitely felt crazy, and she was sure as hell after the day that she had, that she _looked_ crazy. "We were singing the ABC's to Angie and I have an awful voice." She pointed out, laughing a little as she said it. "Angie's face was priceless."

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes right then. "Great."

Lucas' eyes found hers, before she could look away, she felt like he was looking straight through her. She fucking hated that. "Well you two just have fun, then." She muttered, walking past Brooke.

"Peyton, wait…"

When the door slammed loudly through the house, Lucas let out a sigh. His head hurt already, but it really didn't help that he was running around taking care of a screaming baby.

Taunting Peyton with Brooke had probably not been the best (or most intentional) idea he had ever had.

"I'm a dick." He muttered before looking up at Brooke who was starring after Peyton. "Brooke?"

She turned back to him, giving him a tight smile. "I'm sure she's fine."

He was a total dick.

**AN:** Well, that's chapter one. Basically my thoughts on this are basically, Peyton forgave Lucas too quickly and he deserved to suffer a bit, so here it is. Hopefully you'll enjoy it!


	2. Chapter 2

Taking the Lucas approach had not been the best idea. Peyton's head was pounding while she listened to Mia ramble on and on about her tour. She was happy for her, but _God Damn_ how much can really happen in three weeks?

_Never mind_.

"But the best news is I think they want to extend my tour! Isn't that _amazing_?"

Peyton wanted to scream, but instead she plastered on the fakest grin she could muster. "Mia! That's great." Her voice sounded annoying and fake to her own ears, she could only imagine how they sounded to Mia.

"I know! I'm so glad you did all this for me, Peyton. You and Haley."

Apparently not fake enough.

…

There was something so completely fake about the way Haley was acting towards him. He couldn't stand it. He'd been friends with her since they were seven years old; it wasn't like he couldn't tell she was upset with him.

"Haley, would you stop washing dishes for five seconds?"

She turned her head in his direction placing her hand on her hip. "Did you need something, Luke?"

_Advice_. "Haley, you're being weird. Did I do something?"

"The Mohawk wasn't enough?" she teased, placing Jamie's cup into the dish drainer. "Seriously Lucas, you might want to stop drinking for two hours and maybe you can see things a bit more clearly."

He couldn't stop himself before he was rolling his eyes. Last he checked, he was old enough to drink, he didn't really get why it was _such a big deal_. Sure, fine, he didn't need to be around Jamie but it wasn't like he was an alcoholic or anything. "Okay, Haley."

"Seriously, Luke."

"_Okay_."

…

"Hey Sawyer," Nathan said walking into her office, dragging his finger across one of the desks. "You should hire someone to keep it from being so dirty." He smirked.

As much as she loved him, her head already hurt, she couldn't really stand Nathan's sarcasm right now. "Thank you Nathan, I'll keep that in mind with my huge paycheck."

He smirked again, sitting down in the chair in front of her desk, and putting his feet on her desk, knowing how much it would piss her off. "How've you been?"

"Well all things considered, I've been better." She muttered pushing his feet from her paperwork, "and how have you been?"

"Better."

Peyton wasn't exactly sure why Nathan was here, she was pretty sure it had something to do with Lucas, she couldn't resist thinking that maybe Nathan had been sent her to apologize. That would make Lucas an even _bigger_ pussy than he already was.

"Y'know I told Lucas in high school that he loved you."

She twitched her lips a little in a smirk. Of course, Nathan always knew _everything_. "You did?"

He rubbed his hand along the back of his neck and grinned. "Well something close to that." Nathan had always known that Lucas was in love with Peyton. Through his many (many) failed relationships, he somehow knew that it would come back to Peyton.

Why Lucas assumed he had been talking about Brooke he'd never understand.

"The thing is, Peyton…he loves you. He just has to come around."

She pushed his feet fully off the desk before laughing a little, bitterly. "Last I checked he hated me." She clicked her tongue to the top of her mouth and looked at him, finally. "Plus, I need to move on. More fish in the sea, blah blah blah."

Nathan gave her a grin, placing his feet back on her desk, once again. "Good, you can do better than my pussy brother anyway."

…

He didn't hate Peyton. He wasn't sure why the words had even come out of his mouth. He would assume it had something to do with being lonely, bitter, and drunk (and pathetic) while someone else took care of you.

He was definitely pathetic. If nothing else, he was especially that.

Coming home sober had finally made him see what a complete and total wreck his house was. He had beer cans scattered all through the living room floor along with stacks of mail piled up on his desk.

Now seemed like a perfect time to read a rejection letter or two (or three). Before he could even pick up the first letter, he had a text message from Brooke on his phone, a picture of the two of them and Angie sitting on the couch.

He smiled before closing the phone again – loving a family that isn't his really isn't a great idea. He knew he'd end up getting hurt (or Brooke would) and it wasn't really fair to anyone involved, especially Angie. He turned his phone off so Brooke wouldn't have a chance to call him over, and he wouldn't have the option of saying yes.

Once he started through his pile of mail, he realized it was more junk mail than rejection letters.

He wasn't exactly sure which one was worse.

Lucas couldn't help but grin when he saw a letter near the bottom of the pile.

Someone wanted to make his book a movie.

…

**Author's Note: **Wow! I'm totally shocked by the amount of reviews for the last chapter, and honestly it really makes me smile that you guys are enjoying it so much. Hopefully you'll continue to enjoy it as the chapters go on. Just a tidbit for you, this ultimately is a Lucas and Peyton fanfiction, but there will be stumbling (and other relationships) along the way, it's going to be quite a bumpy ride.


	3. Chapter 3

Tric was surprisingly quiet for a Thursday night, when Peyton walked in around nine o'clock; it was vacant except for a couple sitting at the bar at one end, and Lucas on the other end. Peyton let out a sigh and contemplated walking up to him and yelling at him like the emotionally unstable girl she was at the moment (excuses, excuses) but instead, she stalked upstairs to her office.

Why couldn't she hate him, too? Everything would be so much easier if she could.

She groaned inwardly when she saw someone sitting in front of her desk. She wasn't really in the mood to hear the "next big thing" that would end up being some eighteen year old with a dream and no voice. Disappointment didn't really seem like something she should be adding onto her list of emotions at the moment. "Um, we're not open." She mumbled lamely, hoping they would catch the hint.

"Well, there aren't hours on the door." The hairs on the back of her neck stood up instantly when she heard his voice "I was expecting a warmer welcome from such an amazing executive music producer."

"Julian. You're…here."

He stood up from his chair and turned around to face her. "Don't get so red in the face, I'm only back here for you little boyfriend's movie. Just thought I'd stop by in the mean time, see how much you were missing me." He smirked a little, taking a step closer to her. "By the looks of you, I'd say a lot."

He walked around her, taking a quick 'tour' of her office before looking back at her and grinning "Well better than that damn office they had you stuck in."

"Well you know me, always moving up when I'm down, or something." She cringed a little at how awkward this conversation was going. She had thought of exactly what she'd say to Julian if she ever saw him again. Feeling sorry for herself hadn't been on the 'things to say' list. "But you look good."

"Baby, I always look good." He smirked; again, _he never stopped with that_, before taking a step close to her again. She wanted to groan and push him away, telling him to breathe somewhere else, but she wasn't sure they did that anymore. "But maybe you forgot, being back in Tree Hill and all."

He was prying, she knew he would, he had every right to know about her and Lucas _didn't he_? Well, the lack of her and Lucas was more accurate. "I haven't forgotten." She paused, looking at his face, finally. "He's not my boyfriend." She shuffled her foot against the floor of her office. "He's engaged. Well, was engaged to someone else."

"Ah." he twisted his head around to look at the art on her wall. He took a step towards her album cover, smirking a little "I told you that looked fucked up as hell, right?"

She found herself laughing for the first time, in a long time. "Plenty of times."

…

Lucas couldn't stop himself from starring at Peyton when she entered Tric for the second time in an hour. She had every right to be there, even more than him, really. He had no reason to be drinking before ten o'clock on a Thursday, but the fact that she was walking around with _his damn movie producer_, didn't help. Who the hell was this guy to hit on the first girl in town that he met?

He saw them walk towards the bar. _Together_. Fuck. The last thing he wanted or needed was to see Peyton hang all over some guy she barely knew and drive him crazy.

He had no damn reason to be jealous, and yet, he was.

"Still vodka and orange juice, Peyton?" he couldn't help but overhear it. _Still?_ What the hell did that mean?

Lucas could hear her laugh echo through the bar but couldn't hear her reply. He saw her clink shot glasses with Julian before throwing back the shot. God damn it.

He decided that the best thing to do would be to slip out of the bar before anyone noticed he left. He put a twenty dollar bill down on the counter to cover his shots and headed towards the door. "Lucas!" He heard Julian smirking in his voice before he even turned around to face him. "Come join us, we have a lot to celebrate."

By the look on Peyton's face, it wasn't something that she was playing along with, especially when he looked at her and she wouldn't even meet his eyes. "Nah, I think I'm going to head on home, don't want to overdo it."

Julian laughed, and turned to Peyton. "Damn, he sure isn't like you, is he Sawyer? You could always put back your fair share."

She smiled a little uncomfortable with the entire situation, praying it ended sooner rather than later. Julian _really_ knew how to torture her.

He sighed, looking at the clock and back at them. "Nah, I'm going to head home. You two have fun."

Peyton glanced away from him and back to Julian before stealing his shot and downing it. "Peyton, what the hell!" was the last thing Lucas heard before he walked out of Tric.

…

"Whothehellareyou!" Brooke gasped upon walking into the kitchen and seeing a shirtless man standing over the stove, cooking.

"Oh I'm sorry did I scare you?" he grinned, flipping a piece of bacon in the pan. "I'm a friend of Peyton's."

He watched as relief washed all over her face. "Oh. Well, okay." She still seemed a little skeptical of him "A friend?"

"Something like that."

"Oh." She smiled a little and moved to peek over his shoulder. "Bacon, huh? It must be serious." She bit out, grabbing a mug conveniently placed beside him.

He laughed a little and looked at her. "Well you know, I hate to be the guy that fucks and runs. Thought I'd make bacon." He glanced at her once more before placing the bacon on the plate. "Brooke, right?"

She grinned giving him a seductive smile. "I see my reputation precedes me."

"Something like that. I remember you from Lucas' book. Cheerleader, dimples, and you're going to change the world blah blah, all that shit."

She huffed in response pouring herself a cup of coffee. "Well, I don't really see what Peyton finds so charming about you." She muttered looking at him from the corner of her eye.

He grinned a little, never one to leave an opportunity. "Well you haven't fucked me, have you?"

Before could muster up a witty remark to throw back at him, Peyton walked into the kitchen, running her hands through her tangled hair. "Hey Brooke." She muttered before opening the refrigerator, and catching a whiff of the bacon. "Julian, you suck. You know I love your bacon."

Brooke looked at them with a vacant expression before finally commenting. "I'm guessing you two know each other?"

Peyton laughed a little moving her hair up into a messy pony tail. "Something like that."

…

Nathan was sick and tired of Lucas' whining. Well that was what he called it, Lucas called it being expressive in his emotions, and didn't mind reminding Nathan that not too long ago, he hadn't exactly been all that sober. Or amusing for that matter.

"I think Peyton is with my movie producer."

Nathan groaned a little, feeling the need to beat his head into the coffee table in front of him. "You didn't want her, what is she supposed to do, be a damn nun?"

"No." he answered quickly, rubbing the back of his head. "It's just fast, I guess."

Nathan couldn't help but send a smirk into his brother's direction. Seriously the guy needed help figuring out his own feelings; he really wasn't sure how he was supposed to ever be in a functioning relationship. "You know, Luke every relationship you're in doesn't have to be forever. It can just be fun."

"How the hell would you even know? You and Haley have been married forever."

"Well," he smirked looking at Lucas "unlike you and Haley I actually enjoyed the idea of sex in high school."

Lucas rolled his eyes. "You're so whipped you can't even see straight, don't give me shit about this."

"Dude, I'm just _telling_ you."

"It doesn't really help me to know that Peyton is having _fun_ with my movie producer." He grumbled sitting back into the couch and crossing his arms. The idea of Peyton and Julian even…it just wasn't healthy for him to think about. "She's just moving too fast."

"I'd ask why the fuck you care but I already know the answer. Get your shit straight Lucas, you don't get to sit up on your high horse and say shit like that to her and expect her to run right back to you when you make no effort to apologize or anything, so either apologize or just _shut the fuck up_."

Lucas grumbled some, knowing Nathan was right. He always hated admitting that, to himself or otherwise. "I always knew you liked Peyton better."

"Who wouldn't?"

…

When Nathan finally arrived home after Lucas' all night pity party, and saw his wife asleep on the couch with her music book open on her lap, and Jamie lying at her side, he couldn't help but feel luckier than he normally did when he looked at them.

He moved the book off of Haley's lap gently and pulling the pencil from her fingers, and even as hard as he tried, he knew Haley would wake up. She'd always been a gentle sleeper and now was no exception. When she blinked her eyes several times before focusing on him completely, he couldn't help but grin. "Hey you."

"Hi." She whispered, careful not to wake her sleeping son. "You're home late."

"Too busy beating some sense into Lucas' ass." He grinned, taking a seat beside her on the couch and placing a kiss to her ear. "It reminds me even more than I'm really the luckiest guy on the planet."

"You should already know that by now." She teased, rubbing the skin behind his ear.

He laughed lightly. "I do, trust me. I just could've ended up married to Peyton, how much shit would I be in right now if I did?" he smirked and Haley slapped his arm playfully before placing a kiss on his lips.

Yeah, he was definitely the luckiest man on the planet.

…

**Author's Note:** I just want for it to be known that I love all of your reviews and appreciate every single one of them to bits! Thanks so much. A couple things though: 1) _**BROOKE/JULIAN .HAPPEN.**_ in this story. Sorry to tell you, but I really hated their relationship in season six (and have heard that it gets worse in season seven, so why would I bother trying to fix that hot mess) Julian is here for _Peyton_ and mine and Ulle's amusement. 2) I'm not…exactly a Brooke fan. I'm trying to not make it obvious when I use her but I feel like it comes out that way regardless so I'll go ahead and say that if you're expecting Brooke and Peyton snuggles in this fanfiction, they will cease to exist. The only girly snuggles that will be experienced will be between Peyton and Haley.


	4. Chapter 4

"…so I figured Peyton could help us put together a soundtrack for the movie, y'know considering she was there and everything." Lucas felt like Julian was droning on and on about this damn movie. Of course he wanted to make the movie, but at the moment he was entirely too invested in wonder if he and Peyton were _together_. "I mean, if that's okay, considering you two seem to be pretty fucked up right now."

Lucas wouldn't have minded the comment had Julian seemed sincere. He didn't.

"Yeah yeah, sounds fine."

Julian nodded closing his business folder before looking back at Lucas again. "I really need the re-write Lucas."

"I'm working on it."

…

Haley always felt a little awkward waiting for Peyton in her office. It wasn't the fact that she didn't feel like she belonged, it was the fact that no one else besides Peyton or Mia was ever there, so when she heard someone walking in she always jumped out of her skin.

"Oh my god!" she gasped, putting her hand over her heart when she saw a tall scruffy man carrying a thick folder walk in. "Who are you?"

He tilted his head and gave her a good once-over before smirking. "_You_ must be Haley. I have to give Lucas credit, he's good at descriptions." He stuck his hand out in her direction. "I'm Julian." He waited a beat looking at the unamused look on her face. "His movie producer."

She nodded slowly before taking his hand. "Right. Yeah, I'm Haley. Are you here to see Lucas because he's not here, his mom owns the building but he doesn't really stay around here." She wasn't exactly sure why she was fumbling around a life story for him to listen to, but she decided to ignore the bemused look on his face. "Peyton…works here."

"We go way back. Peyton that is, not Lucas." She tilted her head and rubbed the back of her neck. She wasn't exactly sure what this Julian guy's problem was. He was sort of charming, in an annoying sort of way. "Where is Peyton, anyway?"

"I was wondering the same thing."

Julian shrugged and sat down in Peyton's chair tapping his fingers against the desk in no rhythm what so ever.

"…so how exactly do you know Peyton?" Haley could easily admit that curiosity got the better of her in this situation. He seemed like Peyton's type no doubt and he was definitely charming. Not to say that it didn't bother her a bit that Peyton hadn't bothered to mention him.

He grinned a little, putting his arms behind his head. "Well, we were together awhile." 'Awhile' really meant two years, and no matter how hard he tried, it still struck a pain inside of him to know that she left him for _this_ place. It was full of pine trees and stupid corner shops that didn't have shit in them.

Stupid fucking Tree Hill with its one fucking coffee shop.

"Together awhile." She repeated looking at him. Peyton had failed to mention that she had some guy hanging all over her for 'awhile'.

"Awhile." He smirked standing up again and crossing the room towards her. "She failed to mention just how…_tiny_ you were."

"Julian! What the hell? She's married."

He smirked at her, backing away from Haley and moving towards Peyton. "I have business to discuss with you."

Her lips twitched a bit before she glanced at Haley. "I have work to do with Haley."

Julian looked between the two women and smirked a bit before he moved over to Peyton and pecked her on the cheek. "Later…" he nodded towards Haley giving her a grin before he walked out of the room.

He knew Peyton was going to have a lot of explaining to do.

…

"So you're basically telling me that you had a live-in boyfriend for two years but you broke up over Lucas' book?"

"…well, basically." Peyton replied chewing on the side of her lip. This hadn't come out exactly the way she had planned for it to. It sounded mostly like a bunch of jumbled experiences.

Haley nodded a little bit before standing up quickly looking around the room. "So where are we recording?" she asked trying not to read too much into Peyton's relationship with Julian. It really wasn't her business and if Peyton wanted to carry on a no strings attached relationship with him for the time being, who was she to say anything?

"The built-in studio should be finished soon." She muttered rubbing her hands across her jeans.

"I can't wait to get started!" she said enthusiastically, smiling at Peyton. "I have to go pick up Jamie, but hopefully we can get started soon."

Peyton nodded, touching Haley's arm. "It'll be great, Hales."

Haley grinned at her before moving away to grab her bag. She was really nervous about making her next album, what if the reception wasn't good? Or what if she had to go on tour again? It wasn't really the best time, all things considered. She had to stop thinking about it or else she'd drive herself nuts. She turned back to Peyton, slinging her bag over her shoulder and smiled at her. "So why don't you come to dinner tonight?"

Peyton twisted her mouth slightly and nodded. "Okay. Um, just you and Nathan, right?" Lucas was pretty much the last person she wanted to see right now, but she couldn't very well ask Haley not to invite him.

"I'm pretty sure it's just going to be me and you, actually. Lucas and Nathan are helping Jamie build a tree house, so I haven't really seen either of them in the last two days." She couldn't help but laugh at how childish Nathan had gotten over the whole thing. Nathan hated more than anything to think that he was bad at something, and when Lucas, pretty much effortlessly, started to nail the wood together all she could hear was Nathan getting more and more pissed every time he didn't do it exactly right.

Peyton laughed a little, rubbing at the back of her head before nodding. "Yeah, it'll be fun, Hales."

"Okay, we'll say…seven?"

Peyton nodded and smiled at her. "Seven's great."

…

"Goddamnit, Lucas!" Nathan flinched pulling his hand close to his chest. "That was almost _my fucking hand_!"

"I was all the way over here; I was a foot away from _your_ damn hand."

Peyton walked into Nathan and Haley's backyard and couldn't help but chuckle some watching Nathan look like someone had almost taken away his candy or something. "You know Nathan; you can't be good at everything."

"Sawyer, what the hell are you talking about?" he turned around and smirked. "You know I'm good at everything."

"Mhmm, where's your wife?" she smiled propping her hand on her hip and looking at him.

Lucas glanced at Peyton and then back at his hands. He couldn't believe Haley or Nathan hadn't mentioned she'd be here. "Uh, hey Peyt." He said lamely.

She glanced up at him and gave him a tight smile. "Hey Lucas." She wasn't exactly happy to see him, it hurt like hell, but she wasn't about to make anything uncomfortable for Nathan and Haley, or even Jamie.

"How're you doing?" he was being a little more brave about talking to her than he anticipated being. He couldn't help himself, he felt like an asshole and he wanted to make it up to her, but as forgiving as Peyton was, everyone has to have a limit.

Peyton looked up at him, again and cleared her throat. "It was good seeing you Luke." She looked back to Nathan and slapped his arm and smiled at him. "Don't be such a jerk."

"I'll try, Sawyer. Don't get your hopes up."

She laughed a little, walking towards their glass doors. "Don't worry, I won't."

Nathan waited until he could no longer see Peyton before he slapped Lucas in the back of the head. "You're such a fucking asshole."

"Ow!" he howled rubbing the back of his head. "Ass."

…

"Peyton!"

Peyton turned to see Jamie running towards her, she couldn't help but smile when the little boy ran over and held out his hand. She slapped her hand against his smaller one before ruffling his hair. "How're you doing, little buddy?"

"I'm okay."

"Where's mommy?" she asked standing back up. He pointed towards the kitchen before running in that direction. She laughed a little as she followed him and saw Haley standing over the stove stirring what looked like spaghetti sauce. "Hey, Foxy!"

She jumped slightly before giving Peyton a big smile. "Hey, you're a little early."

Peyton shrugged off her jacket and smiled at her. "Hey now, Haley James Scott, I was not going to let you cook all by yourself, even if I am the worst cook on the planet."

"Mamma? When is Daddy gonna be done with my tree house?"

Haley laughed some putting Jamie's food down in front of him about twenty minutes later. "Soon Jamie. I hope."

Peyton couldn't help but laugh at the helpless little look on his face; he looked like he just knew the tree house would never _really_ be done. Mostly because Lucas and Nathan would argue with each other until they got sick of each other and never pick the project back up afterwards. "Jamie if they don't fix it, I have someone who will for you, okay?" it probably wasn't her place (and she could already see how pissed Nathan would be) to get Julian to do it, but she just couldn't stand seeing the defeated look on his face.

"Awesome!" he said bouncing in his chair excitedly. "Thanks, Aunt Peyton."

Peyton couldn't help but let her face fall a little when he said it. Sure, she knew that they weren't biologically related, and never would be, but when she imagined she and Lucas getting back together she always wanted to be an aunt to Jamie, it hurt and felt good at the same time that he already saw her like that. "You're welcome, Jamie."

Haley felt so proud of Jamie in that moment. She had never told Peyton this in so many words, but regardless if she and Lucas were together or not, she and Nathan had always thought of her as family, and having Jamie verbalize just made her so proud. She reached over and rubbed the back of his head as he slurped up a forkful of spaghetti, before she turned to smile at Peyton. "You're welcome here, always, Peyton."

Peyton gave Haley a watery smile, and reached over to put her hand on top of hers. "I know, Haley." The best part of it was that she really did.

**Author's Note: **I'm really stunned at the amount of feedback I've received for this fanfic, I appreciate it so much, and each and every review and it really motivates me to continue writing the story. I'm glad everyone seems to be enjoying Julian being here, because he's going to be sticking around for awhile, but Lucas and Peyton will be interacting next chapter more, for sure. I just wanted to establish the other relationships more fully since season five left a lot to be desired with the four of them, so I wanted to make sure it was all established that they were close (this is my mind, okay haha) but from now on there will be more of a focus with them together. So hopefully you all enjoyed this (super PH-filled) chapter! Thanks so much, again!


	5. Chapter 5

Over the past few weeks, Lucas had felt like his life was at a total stand-still. He had done the same basic thing for days, wake up, eat breakfast, work on his script rewrite, eat more, and work more and finally go to bed. Even he had to admit it was a pretty boring schedule.

His temples throbbed while he tapped his fingers against his keyboard for the final time, adding what he hoped would be the final sentence in his rewrite. Leaning back in his chair, he finally let his eyes rest closed and listened to the pile printer spit out each and every page of his script.

…

Julian thumbed through Lucas' script, glancing up to see the worried look on the blonde's face. It was good, sure. It lacked a lot of emotions in the scenes where he wanted it, but he could definitely work with it. "Stop pacing. I like it."

Breathing a heavy sigh of relief Lucas nodded. "Good." Watching Julian thumb through his script and mark in it, had been a bit unsettling, even he had to admit. "Do you want me to change anything?"

"Not yet." He glanced at his watch, tapping it. "Have places to be, but we'll talk about it later. Good job, Lucas and thanks."

Even Lucas couldn't help but get a dopey smile when Julian walked out of the room.

…

Peyton was pretty pissed off by the fact that she had been waiting on Julian to show up for thirty minutes. Some things never really did change. He was always too busy with his work to come and get dinner with her, yet he always made promises.

That was really the foundation of their entire relationship, broken promises.

It was always the same, she'd look around whatever restaurant Julian had decided to ditch her in and see all the sad looking faces. They all seemed to say 'poor girl got stood up, look at her honey.' It really pissed her off.

"Hey, Baby. Sorry I'm late." He noted the pissed off expression on her face before he even moved towards her to kiss her cheek. Sure, he knew he was late but he didn't think it granted her to be that pissed about it. "I had to do a little work on Lucas' script."

"Don't call me Baby, Julian." She could practically hear the anger dripping from her own words, yet she couldn't stop herself. "I really shouldn't be surprised, don't be sorry."

He couldn't stop the smirk from forming on his lips. "You never change you know that? Always the same argument, every time."

She huffed a little in response before looking at him and cracking a smile. "Whatever."

…

Lucas felt like he was a sophomore in high school again when he saw Julian and Peyton part ways in front of the newest restaurant in town. He was back to the beginning, watching her from afar with someone he was basically forced to like.

He didn't look away quick enough, apparently because within minutes Peyton had caught his eye across the street. He waved his hand at her and walked across the street to greet her, it was the polite thing to do, after all. "Hey Peyton." He was careful not to use any nicknames that might spin her off into a pissed off rant. "Do you like this place?"

She glanced behind her and looked to Lucas again, and nodded. "Yeah it was pretty good." This couldn't have been more awkward. The fact that Lucas was even speaking to her really shocked her, but the way he was talking to her – like they were friends – really pissed her off. Since when were they friends again?

It pissed her off that Lucas always got to define the state of their relationship.

"You headed home?" he mumbled questioningly before looking up at her, again. "Because I can walk you," he saw the annoyed expression on her face, so before she could reject him he continues "if you want I mean."

She hesitated slightly before nodding a little. She wasn't exactly sure why she was allowing him to walk her home when she probably should've told him to go fuck off, but she headed in the direction of her house with him walking slowly beside her. "Thanks…"

He nodded his head, slowly walking with her, keeping his stride even with hers. He waited a few moments before he decided it was safe to speak again. "Peyton I just…I'm really sorry." She didn't make any motion like she was going to say anything, she he took a deep breath and continued. "I'm an asshole; I never meant those things I said to you. I know it doesn't change anything now, but I wanted you to know…I'm sorry."

"You said you hated me." She stated simply. She wasn't about to accept his apology that easy. "That was pretty fucked up, Luke."

He looked at her and saw her eyes downcast on the sidewalk and felt a familiar ache in his chest. No matter what he had said, he still hated knowing that he hurt her this badly. "I want to make it up to you."

"I'm not sure I want you to." She said carefully. "Lucas…I still…" she paused biting her lip before looking up at him again. "I still love you, but that doesn't mean I should." She wanted to slap him more than anything and tell him how she didn't accept his apology and never would. He could die alone for all she cared, but the worst part was that he would know she didn't mean it. "I appreciate the apology."

Lucas felt his chest ache even more. She had every right to be pissed at him, and not forgive him but it still sucked to know that she may never forgive him. He wanted more than anything for them to be friends like they used to be. He hated the part of him that had done this to her. "Yeah." He squinted slightly at the bright street lights before his eyes returned to hers, finally. "I'm really sorry."

"I know." She bit her lip and sighed. "Just walk me home, okay?"

"Okay."

…

Lucas had decided that walking ten blocks with Peyton in silence had to be the longest walk of his lifetime. It was uncomfortable and tense, and he hated that. Everything with them used to be so easy and effortless. "Well, looks like your stop."

She turned her head towards the house she shared with Brooke and nodded her head slightly. "Not exactly in a hurry to get back to a screaming baby." She smirked slightly, noticing the light on in Brooke's bedroom. "But you'd know more than me about that." There it was again, that bitterness. God she hated herself and her tongue sometimes.

He shifted uncomfortably looking up towards Brooke's window and nodding a bit. "It's just…easier sometimes. To forget and pretend." He caught her eye before she looked away again. "You'd know a lot about that." He shot back before he could stop himself.

"Goodnight."

God she hated how he knew her. Well, knew who she used to be.

"Good night."

…

**Author's Note:** I know I know! This chapter was entirely too short, but like I promised there was Lucas and Peyton interaction, and the upward motion of this story has to actually start at the apology, so…Hopefully you all still enjoyed it, and thanks again for all the reviews! If you have any questions or anything, feel free to ask! Thanks so much!


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